The curious case of the missing Stay Puft

Sunday night I was quietly reading a book (cough cough, Harry Potter, cough) in bed when I heard the familiar ting of an email hitting my iPhone. As I opened my Exchange email folder for work, I was struck with horror:

staypuft napper [staypuftnapper@******.com]

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To:

 Katie 

Sunday, August 19, 2012 8:40 PM

Katie,

I have taken your Stay Puft Man. If you ever want to see him again, you will complete the tasks I give you this week. If you attempt to find him, or cheat on the tasks you are given, he will see the inside of a s’more and you’ll never see him again.

Your first task will be a scavenger hunt. Throughout the building, I have hidden some gifts, which you will need to complete the second task.

Here’s your first clue: it stinks, it's gross, it's the room ladies avoid most, and it's where you'll have to go, if you ever want to know, the location of your man.

Sincerely,
The Stay Puft Napper
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You see, I'm a longtime lover of Ghostbusters, and I have (had) this lil guy:

staked out on my desk for the past few weeks. Sadly for Stay Puft, his life on my desk hasn't been an easy one. Ever since his arrival, people have stolen him, moved him around and tried to put him in the garbage.

But this? I never expected this. There is clearly a deranged criminal on the loose in my office.

Upon arriving at work Monday morning I checked the men's bathroom, the obvious answer to the clue from the email, and was promptly sent on a wild goose chase around my office, finding bags of large marshmallows in each location.
The last item was a ruler and an elmers glue, with a note instructing me to build a 2 ft tall Stay Puft man with the marshmallows by 530pm or else my Stay Puft would be run over in the parking lot.

I couldn't let that happen, so I built this gem:

Stunning replica, no? I left him in the kitchen as a sacrifice.

After a long afternoon of waiting for another email concerning the whereabouts of my beloved Stay Puft man, I received another email detailing more tasks for tomorrow...

staypuft napper [staypuftnapper@*****.com]

Actions

To:

 Katie 

 

Monday, August 20, 2012 4:09 PM

The first two tasks you have passed, now a tribute you’ll pay. Have a dry-erase marker handy, for throughout the day tomorrow, these things you will say.

“I collect spores, molds, and fungus”

“I ain’t afraid of no ghost”

“Mother puss bucket!”

“I am the gatekeeper (or keymaster)”

“It smells like barbecued dog hair”

“That’s a big twinkie”

RULES:

Write your list on the window, so we can all see. Use these famous lines in witnessed conversations, and then check them off the list as you do.

Finally, if you want to see the Stay Puft Man again, you will need to tell your colleagues that you prefer to be called Egon or Venkman for the day. Customers excluded, if anyone calls you Katie, you’d better correct them, or your man may get too close to the wrong end of a roasting stick.
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And alas, I left work for the day without my Stay Puft man. Only time will tell what other vicious tasks I must perform to get back the one I love, but maybe, just maybe, tomorrow I will be able to save him from this office villain.